Viva La Papa

OK, so the big story is the death of Pope John Paul II. I'm not going to make a big deal out of it, because although I am Catholic, I have pretty much abandoned my faith a long time ago. But the dude deserves some props, and some criticism, so here goes.

Breaking the string of Italian Popes - that was huge. Maybe we thought it would open the door for there to someday be an American Pope, but it was more. Coming from Poland, his people oppressed by the Iron Fist of Soviet Communism, the Karol Wojtyla papacy was immediately about religion AND politics. And he used his position to help bring down the Soviet Union. Welesa could not have been successful without John Paul II. No matter how far you're up Ronald Reagan's ass, you have to recognize that.

And he did use his bully pulpit to highlight the hypocracy of the Western World on issues such as AIDS, famine, third-world poverty and the death penalty. Hey, he and I will never agree on abortion, but he's the dude in charge of religion, so he had to do what he had to do. He never backed down from a fight. Except one.

Why he didn't bring down the swift sword of justice on the culture of pedophilia in the American priesthood is completely beyond me. Yeah, there are priest shortfalls in America, but Christ, keep importing them from Ireland. Find me a Catholic parish in America with a pastor from Ireland, and I'll show you some parishoners that are tickled pink. Yeah, the lawsuits could have bankrupted the Church - but come on, you can't tell me the Holy Father went light on these fuckers for financial reasons. So that leaves only one thing - forgiveness. But that's bullshit - because while Christianity and Catholicism preach forgiveness, they also preach atonement and punishment. That's what the kneeling on beans and confession bullshit is all about.

So, I'll never truly understand why he didn't lay waste to the US Catholic leadership. If he had done that, he would have been the perfect Pope for his time. As it turned out, he was merely the best we could have hoped for.

The next Pope will have an enormous hat to fill. I won't care much, I no longer believe you have to worship a certain way and go through certain motions to earn eternal life. I no longer believe that death will be a joyous occasion that brings us home to Jesus. I genuine hate the hypocracy of American Christianity, which is heavy in condescension and condemnation, and light with compassion and forgiveness. But the Pope is important, he's the world's moral beacon, and he needs to not be an asshole. So I hope the Cardinals get it right. And I also hope they get some pitching and some outfield help.